tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post5480692572810462173..comments2024-03-26T07:25:55.850-04:00Comments on A CUP OF JO: Motherhood Mondays: Work/life balanceJoanna Goddardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18109285188206811042noreply@blogger.comBlogger96125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-77825127886286209422013-07-10T07:53:12.388-04:002013-07-10T07:53:12.388-04:00After study a few of the posts on this website now...After study a few of the posts on this website now, and I truly like your way of blogging. I bookmarked it and will be checking back soon.<br /><a href="http://www.hillslittlelearners.com.au/" rel="nofollow">Childcare Sydney</a>hillslittlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02368549250351900538noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-30754726584875071592013-06-03T08:50:12.673-04:002013-06-03T08:50:12.673-04:00It feels so nice to find somebody with some origin...It feels so nice to find somebody with some original thoughts on <a href="http://www.hillslittlelearners.com.au" rel="nofollow">Childcare Sydney</a>. Really thank full to you for starting this. hillslittlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06631383335103271015noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-17971382482085817432013-05-09T02:24:38.538-04:002013-05-09T02:24:38.538-04:00So lovely ! i liked
Dien dan Quang ngaiSo lovely ! i liked<br /><br /><a href="http://diendan.dulichquangngai.net" rel="nofollow">Dien dan Quang ngai</a>Ngô Như Tuyếnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17567706614494831880noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-5515210828028451292013-05-09T02:23:14.247-04:002013-05-09T02:23:14.247-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Ngô Như Tuyếnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17567706614494831880noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-54023377479098984862013-05-09T02:22:04.692-04:002013-05-09T02:22:04.692-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Ngô Như Tuyếnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17567706614494831880noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-23378240698442685902013-03-28T05:24:57.646-04:002013-03-28T05:24:57.646-04:00Hi, your blog is more useful to us. In your blog m...Hi, your blog is more useful to us. In your blog my all the questions which is in my mind related to <a href="http://www.hillslittlelearners.com.au" rel="nofollow">Childcare Sydney</a> is now clear. I easily understand the information and explanation you mentioned in your blog. Thanks for providing helpful information. hillslittlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06631383335103271015noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-39848688973140324722013-03-15T16:04:58.375-04:002013-03-15T16:04:58.375-04:00I totally agree - we could do so much with all of ...I totally agree - we could do so much with all of this information, instead of just batting the issue back and forth we could look at the common concerns and how to make conditions better for working women.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-19363727755773287372013-03-15T15:59:59.628-04:002013-03-15T15:59:59.628-04:00Thanks for bringing this issue up on your blog, Jo...Thanks for bringing this issue up on your blog, Jo. I love this site! I think it is so important that women share their experiences in this area and learn from each other...but still, as Sarah emphasizes in her post, remember that everyone's values and priorities are different, and having a fulfilled life looks different to each person. For me, a balanced life involves writing, because it is my passion, and when I have kids one day I believe I will continue to work in my chosen field (in some manner) because I am a better, happier person when I do what I love. To me, having it all involves loving my life, feeling connected to others and living my values. <br /><br />As a side note, I really want to learn from other women's experiences with work-life balance, but it seems difficult to open the discussion without stirring up heated, insensitive comments (seems like they come up everywhere the topic is discussed online). I find this so frustrating. I think we can only move this dialogue forward and learn from each other if we choose to step back from our own perspectives and try to be more open-minded and respectful. This comment board is much better than most though!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-146288862138882182013-03-13T06:38:05.100-04:002013-03-13T06:38:05.100-04:00I think that mindfully regarding our own expectati...I think that mindfully regarding our own expectations is what determines whether we can 'have it all'. I may not wish for all the career accomplishments some women want just like I don't eat exactly the same food they do. Someone's dream of a perfect dinner out may be lobster, caviar, oysters and martinis. I would not like to have any of that. Sure, it is associated with wealth and a cultured palate... but why would I try to crave something just because other people crave it? Give me a thin crust margarita pizza and some wine, please! <br /><br />It is exactly the same with ANYTHING in life. The work we choose to do, the home we choose to live in, the clothes we wear... why is it that we are constantly being pressured into wanting specific things because other people want them? I have wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember (I'm not there yet). Not because I think it will complete me as a person, or because I have some jaded view of what motherhood really is... but because its what I want to do. Sure, I also think its healthy to fill my time with more than one thing, and I plan to do just that. Do I think there is anything wrong with working mothers? Technically, EVERY mother is a working mother so no. I think that women who have jobs outside of their home and their children deserve huge credit! I can only imagine how much hard work that is! However, no one should be subjected to those first few comments (I believe the word lobotomy was used?!?!?!?!?! Do you realize what that means?)<br /><br />I, for one, want to have MY all. All of the things I am passionate about. To those women who want things that are different to me, I respect you. Do what you want, have YOUR all and no one can take that away.Charity Sarahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06293797835863160717noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-35725014209778524702013-03-08T08:01:07.366-05:002013-03-08T08:01:07.366-05:00The happiest people I know are those who wake up e...The happiest people I know are those who wake up every day and try to "give it all." The people I know who live their lives trying to "have it all" are without exception the least happy. Ironically they seem to have the least when it's all said and done.kiwigemhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12288717342990436321noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-25299134098455707462013-03-07T18:51:02.774-05:002013-03-07T18:51:02.774-05:00KGIB- I was trying to compare the way someone migh...KGIB- I was trying to compare the way someone might work up the corporate ladder. I've invested in my home and family. That's all:)<br />Jananhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04127594741785301487noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-37832120120151070152013-03-07T17:04:25.773-05:002013-03-07T17:04:25.773-05:00I started working PT a couple months after having ...I started working PT a couple months after having my LO because it was working for my dad, and my step mom cared for him...But the first few weeks were so hard! I felt like I wasn't doing anything, the house was messy, I was adjusting as a new mom, and i just didn't feel like I had it all..Then when I started working PT, I felt like I had a different purpose but didn't feel like I was failing as a mom for not being there 24/7 with him. I think for me, having it all is being able to, alongside my husband, financially provide for our family, And see the smile on my baby's face. I like having both things in my life- family and job..Sure sometimes it feels like we need more hours in the day to enjoy it, but for the most part I like being a mom and wife, and working tooAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02109582941290756941noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-88446738063102212102013-03-07T02:56:41.693-05:002013-03-07T02:56:41.693-05:00kute
yoyofire.comkute<br /><a href="http://yoyofire.com" rel="nofollow">yoyofire.com</a>Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04220929701517957027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-90643834939547124702013-03-06T22:43:35.978-05:002013-03-06T22:43:35.978-05:00Everyone already said a lot of what I was going to...Everyone already said a lot of what I was going to say... but one additional thing stuck out to me. Her mentioning being "middle class California" Last time I checked or talked to people who live in San Francisco, it's pretty expensive. I felt like she was trying to prove she was "one of us" but it rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe because I'm middle class South Chicago... haha, which is a world apart. :) Jessicahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17098833480026701904noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-7757590593217301472013-03-06T15:38:00.641-05:002013-03-06T15:38:00.641-05:00I actually read Lacy's piece first before I re...I actually read Lacy's piece first before I read Slaughter's article, so I was expecting it to be horrible. However when I did zero in on it, what I found was one woman's thoughtful, thorough and personal experience of trying to have a fulfilling career and family life, her struggle with barriers and her personal reflection of her conflict. While I don't agree with all of the points made, how can I cut her down? At the very least we can all give her props for being honest and opening up this discussion.<br /><br />Sarah Lacy's piece also has valid points and I took in her very different experiences also, but unfortunately I found it to be a little more simplistic and her tone abrasive and distracting from her message. I agree that to some degree we all have the power to wield free will, shape our attitudes + make personalized decisions. However I think it's so much more complex than that. Political and socioeconomic factors still play a part and it should be acknowledged in our discussions and Slaughter at least addressed that. To present day: Why are women still getting paid only .77 to every 1.00 men make in the U.S.? Why does the U.S. still lag behind other countries on issues like family leave (for both men and women)? etc. A woman in a CEO position, like Sandberg, will have a vastly different experience than a woman supporting her children with a low paying job.<br /><br />More than ever today, we as women have more freedom to choose who we are and what we do (We are not relegated to sewing, child-rearing and shopping duties; family dynamics are changing with fathers helping out more than ever; women are closing the gap between male and female enrollment in college). Yet there are still roadblocks and I think it's safe to say that for most two-parent families and single parents, the amount of responsibility of child-rearing is usually, though not always, taken by the mother which in turn can and does affect a woman's career. Throw in work culture, beliefs, status, policies and structure: how do they in turn all fit into this debate?<br /><br />Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think Slaughter is simply saying in her experience, 'What are the consequences of trying to foster your career growth and raise a healthy, happy family? What needs to change?' And Lacy is stating, 'What are your priorities? We can make a positive choice through our words, attitudes and actions: one that makes sense to us and is tailored to our well-being and our family.' Sandberg says, 'Roll up your sleeves and give it all you've got. We need women at the top to make positive changes for future generations of women.' And all of a sudden, I'm confused. Why can't we pull out the positive in all of their ways of thinking and use it in a new recipe to use for the good of the cause?<br /><br />I tire of the woman against woman drama (media-wise or other) and maybe a little bipartisanship is in order . Maybe if we judge less, listen more, bash less, embrace honesty, extend respectfulness towards each other's experiences and fine tune our efforts to find common ground, we can work towards shaping a more family-friendly work environment and foster self-fulfillment. It just seems more conducive than bickering and pitting ourselves against each other!<br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /> hello.https://www.blogger.com/profile/16255596038747052414noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-41632236322107239932013-03-06T14:11:31.564-05:002013-03-06T14:11:31.564-05:00While I wince at the judge-y tone in some of the r...While I wince at the judge-y tone in some of the replies, I think I understand what brought it out-- the idea that working mothers work because they want vacations or new lip gloss more than they want to be with their kids, even if the first comment wasn't meant in that manner, the implication could be inferred from it. The truth is, there's no good reason to look over the fence and judge someone else's life. But be careful when talking about what works for you, that you don't judge other people in the process.<br /><br />Seriously, ladies, let's lay off the More-Mom-Than-Thou routine.Crescendohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03068894313641791791noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-69623953417254746532013-03-06T11:18:35.090-05:002013-03-06T11:18:35.090-05:00I definitely think this article contributes to the...I definitely think this article contributes to the Sanberg/Slaughter media frenzy that Sarah Lacy is so quick to descry, and equally quick to cash in on. I personally loved Slaughter's article in the Atlantic because she acknowledged her journey of motherhood in such a distinctly personal way. Does anyone remember that a huge factor in her moving back to New Jersey was to be closer to a teenager that was struggling? I feel like that is such an essential part of the debate. A mother's duty often revolves around a child's need, and no one can predict, judge, quantify or typify that. As the mother of a child with special needs, I can say that many of the solutions (economics aside) that work for these families would not work for ours. Read Emily Rapp's new book from Penguin about parenting a child with Tay-Sachs, and try to make either of these theories even halfway logical in perspective MLChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12462487456492446861noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-68025883901071056392013-03-05T23:49:24.709-05:002013-03-05T23:49:24.709-05:00Why would you have to "earn a place" in ...Why would you have to "earn a place" in your own home? That seems like a weird thing to say.KG1Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05050678934517053585noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-133818356936722622013-03-05T21:32:25.799-05:002013-03-05T21:32:25.799-05:00I dont really care much for the term 'having i...I dont really care much for the term 'having it all' or any other terms for that matter. We all become mums for our own reasons and as adults can decide for ourselves what is the best way to raise our children ie. whether or not to work/not to work, to use organic nappies/non organic, daycare/homecare...the list goes on. If we as 'mothers' cared more about our children's wellbeing and how we are setting an example for them and less on terms and the way things 'should' work, we would be in a better place.suzyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08212490575372646792noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-77130049569627932612013-03-05T14:28:08.205-05:002013-03-05T14:28:08.205-05:00http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/17/opinion/sunday/w...http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/17/opinion/sunday/why-gender-equality-stalled.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0Babshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17354839243789057160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-49647393371109165962013-03-05T14:22:45.105-05:002013-03-05T14:22:45.105-05:00I don't see the purpose of Slaughter's art...I don't see the purpose of Slaughter's article or Sandberg's book as addressing whether women and mothers find happiness in their individual choices or are satisfied It's about addressing the gap between fathers and mothers achieving success in their careers and attaining positions of power. Women are earning post-grad degrees equal to or in greater numbers than men in a variety of subject areas. and yet since Slaughter graduated, tons of fathers are at the top of their fields and very few women are at the top of theirs. And the women who have made it to the top are either women who did not have children or entered their careers after their children were older. Fathers of children of all ages are achieving positions of power. Why? Yes, of course, we define what it means for us to have it all & what it takes to makes us happy. But that isn't the point. There are structural barriers that make it very hard for parents, and mothers in particular, to fully commit themselves to their careers while their children are younger. And if it is difficult for women with some means, i.e. can afford childcare, then how are women without means and childcare support facing these challenges? The best-case scenario is that compromising our careers just means that we might hit a ceiling on how far we can go or we achieve greater success later in our lives. And maybe we're all just fine with that and don't see that as problem worth addressing. The worst-case scenario and the reality for a great many mothers is that they can't support themselves independently. And that is dangerous. Our labor structure is designed and built on the free labor that women have provided to parent their children. We need good parents, we need them to raise decent, capable, and independent children. And raising kids is labor-intensive and time-consuming. Slaughter's point was that if we want to see as many women as men reaching the top of their fields, having influence over the way the world runs and have the freedom to financially support themselves independently, then something has to give. We have to deal with the structural barriers inherent in the working world to balancing family life with work life. One person can't be responsible for it all, it can't just fall to women and if all parents are going juggle both family and work hats there has to be flexibility or it can't be done. It's great that many women have figured out how to opt-out & work for themselves, truly. But what kind of blinders must you wear to expect that is possible for all parents? Flexibility is only possible if you work for yourself? And how does opting out of a system that is designed to monopolize all of our time, deal with the problem that out of three women sitting on the supreme court, only one has children while every single man on the court is a father. My beef with Sandberg is that it's all well and good to encourage women to lean in, but without structural support how are mothers suppose do that, exactly? <br /><br />And I'm kind of wondering what universe we live when where a woman who is a tenured professor at Princeton & was appointed the Director of Policy Planning at the State Dept. can be considered a failure? She shared her struggles as a way of discussing the challenges to working and parenting, but a failure? Really? Babshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17354839243789057160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-72379302794192742312013-03-05T10:35:31.873-05:002013-03-05T10:35:31.873-05:00Such a good perspective! :)Such a good perspective! :)Lauren Knighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07358496490976869347noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-47002341734455641082013-03-05T09:40:26.937-05:002013-03-05T09:40:26.937-05:00YES! Sarah Lucy, PLEASE READ BEFORE YOU CRITIQUE. ...YES! Sarah Lucy, PLEASE READ BEFORE YOU CRITIQUE. I don't even think she read Slaughter's article. Slaughter raises very important issues about practical obstacles in the modern work force that hinder a woman's success. <br />"I fear that the obstacles that keep women from reaching the top are rather more prosaic than the scope of their ambition."<br />Her point is that saying "You can do it!" is not enough. We have to talk about HOW we are going to do it. How are we going to change work hours and decrease pressure to travel and increase how acceptable it is to work from home. <br />Silly critique that paints Slaughter in a narrow, pessimistic, condescending light. She is saying more women need to be in leadership roles so that the entire system can see some change. rkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07132732077207302677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-58276086517536854402013-03-05T01:49:22.211-05:002013-03-05T01:49:22.211-05:00I am with you Lindsey McLean. I am a stay-at-home ...I am with you Lindsey McLean. I am a stay-at-home Mom of 4 kids and have it all. I am my own boss. I schedule what I want when I want. I run an excellent home (didn't say perfect:) I started on the ground floor...(In the corporate world you start by fetching coffee, or printing things, or doing the tasks no one else wants and work odd hours. I changed poopy diapers and cleaned up toys a lot, and slept and showered odd hours) But I have earned my place in my home. I am proud of what I've done. I am there for the quantity and quality moments (that can't be arranged in reality. C'mon, how many of those "arranged" quality moments end in tears, anger, or disappointment?) I have many interests and projects and things I do. When I want to learn something new I go learn about it. I read all the books I want to. I spend time with my husband every day and go on dates with him twice a week. I do things alone. I do things with friends. We throw parties. I am involved at church, the community, and my children's schools as much or little as I choose. My kids are now 16, 14, 12 and almost 10. My children share things with me that I would have never shared with my own mother. They see the hard work I do, the fun I have, the successes, the failures. I would not trade those early years for anything. And my work isn't done. Through the teenage years it is just as important to be home. Seriously, I have it all and wish every other woman could too!Jananhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04127594741785301487noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28060897.post-56434706587635262422013-03-04T23:56:41.399-05:002013-03-04T23:56:41.399-05:00I agree that the tone of this article felt defensi...I agree that the tone of this article felt defensive and critical. It did not leave me feeling accepted. I felt worse. I felt like if I didn't have a high profile career, a healthy marriage and well-adjusted children I was falling short. Since becoming a mother I have declared myself "in-defensive-of-mothers." There are just so many ways to do it. <br />I love what Alex R said about ""You can have it all" can become the rallying cry of the privileged, and implies that if women DON'T have it all, it's because they didn't work hard enough. This leaves unexamined issues of poverty, affordable child care, unequal distribution of domestic work, and more. The author is right that working women and mothers each have different experiences, and it is our society's inability to account for those differences that Slaughter challenges." So well said!<br />People need different things to feel fulfilled. Go, find your own way, and if you are so lucky to feel happiness don't let mom guilt or societal judgments bring you down. cassidyjanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18271081307975274367noreply@blogger.com