When I started dating Alex, I knew I loved him early on. I'm usually pretty guarded, but since I was so enamored, those three words lingered dangerously on the tip of my tongue. So, after just a couple weeks, as we were falling asleep, I couldn't help nervously whispering, "I think I'm falling in love with you." His reply? "I think I'm already there."HURRAY AND THANK GOD.
Obviously, however, it doesn't always go so smoothly. In past relationships, I've said "I love you," and the other person just said, "Thank you"—or vice versa. Ouch. Then you have to just sit there with a big I-love-you elephant in the room for the rest of the night.
It's nerve wracking because, as Seinfeld says, "if you don't get that return, that's a pretty big Matzo ball hanging out there."
Have you ever been the first to say I love you, or do you prefer to wait?
(Top photo of us by Max Wanger, back when we were newly engaged and just babies!)
No! Like a chicken I always waited to hear it first. It was always well worth the wait though :)
ReplyDeleteyes. if you feel it, say it.
ReplyDeletei told my fiance that i loved him first and tho he didn't respond in kind, i was ok with that.
I have a funny story about how my boyfriend and I said I love you. It was maybe 2 months into us dating and I knew I was in love with him. I thought that would be way to early to say it to him. I was afraid of rushing it and scaring him away. But one night we were cuddled up on the couch watching a movie and I decided what the heck I'll do it. So I looked at him and said, "guess what?" (My nervous way of starting.) and I was going to say I love you after he said what. However, when I said guess what he looked at me and said I love you. That was 4 years ago this month. I give him a hard time about beating me to it.
ReplyDeleteEmily
eageremily.blogspot.com
Aww that's cute :)
DeleteHe said it first!! We were in New Orleans and had only been dating a month or so. I was still hung up on an ex and MADE myself say it back!!! Ahhh!!! I even tripped over the words so hard trying to say it. I felt bad. I think he could tell... Matzo ball for sure. Little did I know, I was on my way to falling seriously, seriously in love. Five and a half years later, still there! The words come speeding out of my mouth any chance I get!!
ReplyDeleteI said it first and it was an awful, awkward moment when I didn't get it back. Luckily, when he actually said it months later it meant so much more :)
ReplyDeletehahaha, poor George!
ReplyDeleteOh I think my heart fell in love with your hubby when I read his sweet reply to you! right.out.of.a.movie. so sweet. xxoo
ReplyDeleteloved this line: "then you just have to sit there with a big I-love-you elephant in the room"
ReplyDeleteI was the first to say it, and he didn't reciprocate, but he eventually did later on! It was totally fine.
I did say it first. Like you, we were falling asleep, and I said, softly, "I love you." He replied, "What did you say?" and then, when I said, "you heard me," "I love you, too."
ReplyDeleteNow we're married, have a 2 year old, and I'm 25 weeks pregnant with our second daughter. :)
Love this story. See, even with a broken computer you're inspiring the world and spreading love! :)
ReplyDeletei was the first to say it with my husband, but that was the first time i had been the first to say it! it worked out pretty well for us.
ReplyDeletehah! My husband and I have the debate about WHO said it first! I distinctly remember saying it on NYE before bed, but apparently he was either passed out or a little too drunk to remember. He says it was a month later when we were at a friend's house and all I said in response was "cool". But I only said cool because I had already thrown it out there - it was cool that he felt the same way!
ReplyDeleteBut, generally, in relationships, I think I've always been the one to throw it out there first. I'm not a feelings-holder-inner :)
My then-boyfriend now-husband said it first, probably a month after we started dating. I found an eyelash on his face and had him make a wish on it, and after blowing it away I asked him what he wished for. I'll always remember his sweet, almost shy response, "I wished I would have the courage to tell you that I think I'm falling in love with you." Ahhh! Of course I reciprocated. :)
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Joanna. Made my day!
xoxo
When my husband and I had been dating about three weeks, I said it in passing - like, "Look, I love you and all, but those sneakers are awful." Something easy like that, not even realizing what I was saying until it came out - then I clapped my hand over my mouth, like whoops. But we both realized it was true. That's why it came out so easily.
ReplyDeleteThat was 2005. We married in 2008 and are going strong. :)
This clip is hilarious! I love how Seinfeld makes great episodes about the little things we all experience! Great post!!! I would never go first.
ReplyDeletehe said it first. i was 17 and he was my first boyfriend. i had no idea what i was feeling but i guess he was sure way before i was. we've been together since then - 13 years ago :)
ReplyDeleteI definitely have! My husband and I knew each other for 6 years before we got together, and I was always in love with him. He is 6 years older than I am, so it wasn't really practical to tell him before I was 18, you know legalities and all. Since I'm not one to keep emotional baggage, one night 2 weeks after my 18th birthday we were hanging out on a beach, drinking and talking, and I just couldn't take it anymore and blurted out: "I've been in love with you for 6 years!" He thought I was just drunk, but not the case, the alcohol just made it easier to say. It took him a few months for the events of that night to sink in! He was my first and only boyfriend too, btw, so that was my only experience expressing such heavy feelings to a person! So I said it first, he totally reciprocated, it was the start of our relationship and now nearly 12 years later, we are married and have 2 kids!
ReplyDeleteI have a similar story to Emily's...My boyfriend and I were laying together one night and I kept trying to get him to focus so I could tell him something (that I was in love with him), but he kept changing the topic. Eventually, I told him I was trying to tell him something...and then he said it! He knew all along that's what I was going to say and he wanted to say it first...hence trying to get me off topic.
ReplyDeleteI prefer to wait but I couldn't with my fiance, the joy on his face when I said it was amazing, he hadn't wanted to be first either. We have said it every day since :-) xox
ReplyDeleteI don't wait...i am usually the first one to say it aloud :)
ReplyDeleteBtw this is a lovely picture of you guys. Such a sweet story.
Gorgeous photo! And what a sweet memory. I'm ready to say it, but waiting due to nerves :)
ReplyDeleteI said it first - and more sort of yelled it at him, like DUH isn't it obvious! He was surprised I think and maybe a little scared. And the next morning he said, "I've been up all night thinking about what you said, and I love you too." (Inner brain high five to myself!)
ReplyDeleteMy boyfriend and I had been together about one month when we were in bed one evening and he started babbling on about our relationship. I knew that he was trying to say "I love you" but I could tell his nerves were getting the better of him, so I told him I loved him. He said it straight back and I could tell he was relieved. We laugh about it now because he hates to admit that I said it first.
ReplyDeleteYep! My husband was the first person I said "I love you" to (we were babies when we started dating!) and I said it first. He was so afraid of scaring me off that he'd been biting his tongue for weeks, and I couldn't take it anymore so I blurted it out one night. It was perfect. :)
ReplyDeleteAwww, that's so sweet!!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm weeping in the office THANKS A BUNCH.
I waited to say it with my husband. Even after he said it to me, I was incredibly afraid to say it back to him even though I did love him. I was still afraid of it since I had been hurt in the past for saying I love you and it was my way to guard myself. I think after about 4 days of dreading saying it back to him I finally just blurted it out. Actually, I think I kinda screamed it at him. LOL
ReplyDeletei've never said it first, but i think i've felt it first. :) i've been lucky that it worked out for the most part with past boyfriends and the current one, especially.
ReplyDeletekw, ladies in navy
Oh I'm never the first to say it, I'm always so tepid about jumping into new relationships - even new friendships! I think the funniest (and bittersweet) was when I was dating a guy who was really, really sweet but super messed up at the time (we're still friends to this day) and he said "I love you - tell me you love me, even if you don't mean it. I don't care. I just want to hear you say it."
ReplyDeleteMy husband first told me, "I think I'm falling in love with you" and I think I just responded by kissing him - then a few weeks later he just said "You know I love you, right?" And I said "I know. I love you too!"
Oh, man is that a sweet story, Joanna! I think I've said it first ONCE -- but otherwise have always waited for the other person to say it.
ReplyDeleteWhen my husband and I were dating (long distance for the first year and a half), we went to dinner one weekend while I was visiting him. As we were looking over the menu he started saying, "I have something I want to say to you." To this day he makes fun of me about how I straightened up in the chair, I guess to ready myself for whatever he was about to say. It was the best night.
I said it once over instant messenger! I was having a party and went upstairs to say a quick hi to him over aim. I ended the conversation with the dreaded "I love u." His response was "have fun"..... Forgive me I was tipsy and in college BUT 6 years later he says it to me as much as he can!
ReplyDeleteI said it first, and for a long time he didn't reciprocate ... but he warmed up to me. Now we've been married almost 4 years and are so in love we can hardly stand it :) As weird and awkward as the first "I love yous" can be, it gets better -- now we are always telling each other "I love you," whether it's on the phone, at night before falling asleep, or just anytime.
ReplyDeleteBethany
I am a very guarded person too and it takes a while for me to allow myself to say it. But with my now boyfriend, it felt right.
ReplyDeleteLou
www.thekeypieces.co.uk
Like bookishpenguin I said it totally on accident! We had been together a few months and were in the grocery store (aka the least romantic setting ever) doing a last-minute shop for my family's annual harvest party. He came over holding a few things I had forgotten, and I was just like "oh, thanks - love you!"
ReplyDeleteI was so embarrassed! When we got home and I had stopped being awkward, he pulled me in really close and told me he loved me too - and that he had been waiting for the perfect time to say it. Whoops!
He then proceeded to meet all my family and friends.
While I don't recommend my method, we've been together three years, so I guess it worked. :)
i said it first, and i love hanging that over my husband's head! ( ; it was terrifying, but i figured i had nothing to lose. if it freaked him out and ended things, well then, he wasn't the guy for me, right? it took him a little longer to get comfortable saying it to me, but i found it very empowering to be the first one to throw the "i love you" confetti into the air.
ReplyDeleteSo cute! My now husband was the one who said it first after dating for only 3 weeks. My reply: "Already? It's a bit soon don't you think?" Hahah oops! Poor guy. He got his 'I love you' from me about a month later. I couldn't say it until I felt ready.
ReplyDeleteI love this most! It is sweet and funny! My fiance said "I love you" first. And at the perfect moment! Later, he told me he was really nervous because he had never said it first to anyone. <3
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletehahah! This post cracked me up! I said "I love you" first to my now fiancee and he said "thank you". Granted I said it early but still! We now laugh about it because it says so much about the type of people we are. I'm wide open and Brian is a bit more guarded :) It all worked out in the end though! Can't get him to stop saying it now!
ReplyDeletexoxox
Kate
www.365til30.com
I said it first! I knew I was in love with him after a month or so, but it took me another two months to work up the courage to say it. Two weeks later, I was seriously considering breaking up with him (I mean, where was this going if he didn't love me back?) when he finally said those three little words. He wanted to be sure how he felt rather than tell me what I wanted to hear. It'll be 9 years this May. :)
ReplyDeleteHe said it first. I think in generally men like to be the ones to ask out, say I love you, propose, etc.
ReplyDeleteThat clip is so funny! I'm actually going to see Seinfeld tonight!!
i dropped the 'i love you' bomb first with my husband. we were going to college in different states (him notre dame, me pittsburgh) and the first time i came to visit him after a few months of being apart i said it. i whispered it so quietly i think i was kind of hoping he wouldn't hear me :) but he did and thank goodness he said it back!
ReplyDeleteI think its great to just say it if you feel it! If it scares the other person off, maybe they aren't right for you! My (now husband) told me he loved me only a few weeks in. I was so guarded at that time I couldn't say it back, even though I think I felt it then. The best part was that he wasn't offended that I couldn't say it back yet, and waited until I was! We are happily married for 5 years and been together for 13!
ReplyDeleteI've only said it to one person, and that is my husband. He is definitely the romantic one of the relationship. I wanted to say it by our third date. But we had a bit of a rocky time our first year, so I waited until he was ready.
ReplyDeleteI told my husband I loved him first, after 3 months of dating. And he didn't say it back! He needed a little more time to be sure, and after I got past my initial hurt, I was able to understand and lay off. He told me about a month later and we've been together 9 years!
ReplyDeleteThat is so romantic :). Nope, I've had two "great loves" and one is my husband, and both times they said it first. My husband said it two months after we starting dating. I can't remember the other one, which is as it should be.
ReplyDeleteI said it first to my now-husband, and he didn't say it back! We had only been together for a few months, and I had just done something to help him with a family crisis. It was pretty big, and he was feeling really guilty and worried about burdening me. I told him it was no burden; I did it because I loved him. He smiled at me and hugged me tight but didn't say it back. In fact, he didn't say it back for about another year. Turns out there were some hang-ups and issues at play regarding verbalizing feelings and emotions, including (and maybe especially) love. It was really hard for me, and it took awhile to work through it. But now he's just a squishy pile of love, and we've been married for over six years!
ReplyDeleteNo! I mean, I was always too afraid to be the typical girl... but looking back, I think it was silly not to make myself vulnerable. Now I say "I love you" all the time to my husband and three little boys! SO important!
ReplyDeleteI prefer to wait! The first time my boyfriend told me he loved me I just looked at him and said "ARE YOU SERIOUS....?" I wanted to say it back but instead that is what I blurted out.
ReplyDeleteglad to hear that I am not the only one! I said it first after a really great weekend with my boyfriend. It was just bubbling up and since he was the one that pursued me, I wanted to make sure to say it first (I wanted to let him know that I wasn't going to just say "me too"). I think he was surprised but excited him and he said it back pretty quickly.
ReplyDeleteI was the first. I felt it creeping in around the edges after 6 weeks, and finally spilled the beans at 5 months. He ("he" being my partner of nearly ten years and husband of nearly 6) carefully replied "I like you very much, but I am not ready to say that yet." He did say it... eventually... after we'd been together nearly two years!! I still give him endless crap about that (in fact, at our wedding four years into our relationship, we played Cake's "Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps" at our cake-cutting as an inside joke).
ReplyDeleteHere's the important thing: actions speak louder than words, and his actions communicated what his words could not EONS before he finally said "I love you". I think my response by the time he finally said it was, "Yeah, I know."
Yes, I was the first. After a few weeks of dating, my boyfriend and I perfectly knew that we loved each other, but he was kind of guarded too :) And then, one very romantic evening, while embracing each other, I just couldn't hold it anymore and right after a tiny kiss on the cheek I told him "I love you". He said "I love you too", and after that, we've said to each other every signle day <3
ReplyDeleteI was kind of mean to my husband when he said it first. When he said, "I think I'm in love with you," all I could say was, "Well... let me know when you're sure!" He was so embarrassed! In my defense, I had previously been burned by someone who said he loved me, but, you know... that didn't mean much? I was so paranoid after all the word games that it was hard for me to read my husband's shyness as anything but bet-hedging.
ReplyDeleteI know I said it to guys in previous relationships, but I actually can't remember any of them!
I said it first! My husband and I had known each other for years before we started dating, but when we finally got together we both knew immediately that we were meant to be! From the get go he subtly told me that he wouldn't be the first to say, "I love you." All of his past relationships had been with girls who didn't really know how to handle a guy's emotions and so he had become very guarded about showing them (but, we've worked through most of those issues and now he is the most vocal person about what he's feeling!) ANYWAY, he kept telling me that the only things that he would do "first" is ask a girl out on a date and ask her to marry him.. I waited what seemed like a lonnnnnng time to finally say it, in part because I was so nervous, but also because I was worried that he would regret not being the first to say it. When I finally did say it it was such a relief and so exciting.. I still get thrills when I tell him I love him!
ReplyDeleteThat ended up being a lot longer than I meant it to be.. Oops! Loved the post!
The only time I said to someone I was responded to with ' are you sure you mean that? Its a bit early"
ReplyDeleteI said it first... by accident. After a month or so of going out with boyfriend (we're still together 3 years later), we were cuddled up in bed watching a film and it felt so cozy and lovely I kinda just blurted out 'I love you' but he went 'Huh?' as if he hadn't heard (I have a habit of mumbling) and I went 'Ohhh nothing... *PANIC*'.... after the film had finished, he goes "You know when you said 'I Love You' earlier...? I love you too." Still get a big smile on my face when I think about it :)
ReplyDeleteI waited for the perfect moment and my boyfriend blurted it out one day and I was honestly relieved he did it first!! =) It was perfect!
ReplyDeleteErgo - Blog
How beautiful! I don't think a screenwriter could have written the exchange more eloquently. My husband had vowed to himself that the only woman he would utter the words, "I love you" to would be the woman he would marry. So holding strong at 26, after only 7 weeks of dating his 4 years younger girlfriend who was still in college, he turned to her and said, "I can't keep it in anymore, I LOVE you!" and then just to make sure he was confident he had in fact said it, once more he proclaimed, "I love you!" 11 years later, we treasure that we are each others one and only loves.
ReplyDeleteI love this - such a romantic story :)
ReplyDeleteMy husband said it first. I was blown away because he had never said it to anyone and I was fresh out of another relationship so I hesitated and I was a bit scared he might have said it too soon and regret it. I returned the sentiment the next day when I wondered why on earth I wasn't doing. I'd known from the get-go but didn't want to misinterpret my feelings because it was so soon after another relationship.
That was 11 years ago :)
I was the first to say "I love you" to my husband, and it was before we were actually a couple! We had become the best of friends in a short span of time in college, and I knew I loved him early on as well. It was so against my character to do so. I'm so shy and usually so guarded, and he was also my first (and only) love. I could feel he was trying to express his feelings for me though, so I just went ahead and took a chance. It worked! It sure did surprise him though!
ReplyDeleteMy fiance is the only one I've said it to... and he sort of said it first. We were sitting facing each other with my knees between us and he sort of mumbled something into my knees. And I said "Did you just say you love me?" and he said "Yes" and I replied "I love you too!". So he started it, but I kind of said it for both of us :) But then he said it again so I could hear it. Yay! I'm so glad he was my first, I almost said it to my boyfriend before him, but I realize now, that wasn't love!
ReplyDeleteI've never done it! But I've definitely felt it first and cowardly waited to say it as a response only. So silly!
ReplyDeletexo
Oh goodness. I did say it first (luckily he said it back). Because it after a party at which I had too much champagne and he was sitting with my in the bathroom after I'd gotten sick. So romantic.
ReplyDeleteMy boyfriend said it first and I followed a few weeks later. I love how you were still a little guarded with saying I think I am... And his answer also so utterly sweet and eloquent just like it should be for two writers I guess!
ReplyDeleteMy boyfriend earlier that day talked about a friend of his saying "I love you" too soon and it ruined everything, at which point I felt like I was suddenly not supposed to say anything. That of course made me feel like I HAD to say it, and all day I made myself sick not saying anything. I'd look at him and worry that the words would just spill out. That night, on a midnight ferry to Messina (no, not even joking), he told me "actions speak louder than words and I'm not going to tell you that I love you." Which I thought was dumb and I wasn't going to let that stop me. So I told him, "that's fine. But I love you." A few days later he caved. Whether he said it or not, I knew it was true, but it's nice to hear the words.
ReplyDeleteI knew my (now) husband loved me before I felt sure of things myself. And he knew I liked to take things slowly. So, unfortunately, I came to realize I'd have to say it first! He was the first man I really loved, so it was a BIG moment to have to say it for the first time. He could feel my heart beating in my chest, that's how nervous I was! And finally, I spit it out... in French. Je pense que je t'aime. I couldn't even say it in English! Thankfully, he knows enough French to know what I said, and he whispered it right back, in English. I get a flutter in my stomach just thinking about it.
ReplyDeleteI too said I love you first to my husband. I was in the moment and it just slipped out, I couldn't really believe I had let that happen since that was a no-no in my book. But thankfully he replied with I'm in love with you too. Ah...memories. (:
ReplyDeletehttp://amillionreasonswhy7.blogspot.com/
I said "I love you" you first to my boyfriend. I couldn't keep it in any longer, and I had a feeling he felt the same way, so I got up the courage to say it to him one morning in bed. He let me know that he felt the same way :) I'm glad I said it first! There are no rules in love.
ReplyDeleteI said it first to my boyfriend of 9 years, it was after being on the phone all night long for the 100th time and I said "I feel like we should be saying I love you when we hang up", it just felt right, luckily he felt the same way. :)
ReplyDeleteMy husband said "I love you" almost a full year before I was ready/willing to say it. It made for some awkward moments, but I think it was better than saying it just because he had (he might feel differently!). I think it also taught us some good lessons about being patient with each other.
ReplyDeleteI was dating a guy but we were kind of on and off since I kept coming and going from college in a different state. One time I was home on break I felt like it was the right moment and I said, "I love you." He responded with "I love you, too" and then followed up immediately with, "Now if you would just stick around long enough we could work on BEING in love." Sooooo, did he love me like a little sister? Jeeze. That was the moment I decided I was not actually in love with him and never looked back. Happily married to another guy and so so so glad I'm not with that first guy.
ReplyDeleteI know I felt it first but wanted to wait for him to say it first. He's one of those molasses slow guys to come around lol. Well he wrote it first! Yes, wrote. Weird? Maybe. But it was in the sweetest Valentjne message in a giant fortune cookie! He hasn't actually said it yet but after reading all these stories, I think I'm gonna beat him to the punch and actually say it first. Still counts right? ;)
ReplyDeleteAndrea
anakalui
Aww that's so sweet how it happened with you and Alex... could be a scene in a movie! The first time my now husband told me he thought he was falling in love with me (it seems to always start that way... they "think" they're falling, just to be safe!) he was pretty intoxicated. We were 21 and on a bus home from a sorority dance. I wasn't even sure he remembered the next day! Fortunately, he said it again sober a couple days later, and has said it every day for the past 7 years!
ReplyDeleteNope and my boyfriend made me wait 1 year before he said it! But he's the worrier in the relationship, so it was good that it came from him first:) I will wait for him to propose too, even though I think that's quite old fashioned.
ReplyDeleteI did with Mr. Sandwich. I knew it was true, and I wanted to say it whether or not he felt the same. He said, "I love you, too." But it was a very long few seconds!
ReplyDeleteI think love can develop over time to become stronger and stronger but there is a form of love when you have a connection with someone for the first time. I know I had love at first sight with my husband's dog who brought us together!
ReplyDeleteSomehow you managed to go from poignant to hilarious in two sentences! :)
ReplyDeleteGosh, Max captures such beauty and love!
ReplyDeleteI fell in love with my boyfriend on February 20, 2009 at a hockey game when, instead of caring that Ohio State was losing to Michigan, we chatted the entire time. We had been friends but that was the moment I knew. We started "testing the waters" a few weeks later. (I say that because he was moving to NYC after graduation to work 100 hours a week as a banker and I had 2 years of school left.)
Flash forward 10 months when I was visiting him in New York, he ended up working all weekend, it was the second time I'd seem him in 6 months and he was so stressed. I sent him a text that said "we need to talk" just to make him come home so I could tell him how proud I was of him and that I loved him. The words didn't come out eloquently at all and I could barely make eye contact but alas, he responded with "Either you were going to break up with me (which you should have) or you were going to tell me you loved me. I'm happy it was the latter and I love you, too."
I love this post and your story.
--Alex
My boyfriend and I used to saw "rawr" (which means I love you in dinosaur) one day he was rawr-ing at me and I could see in his eyes he really meant it so I said, it's OK, you can say it! And he said "I love you!" and I said it back. I don't know why we waited so long to say the real words, we were so nervous!
ReplyDeleteMy husband (then-boyfriend) whispered "I love you" to me during a slow dance at his company Christmas party 5 months after we started dating. He said it so quietly, and I didn't respond because I wasn't sure I heard him right. Luckily, he said it again later that night, and I said it back. We've been together 10 years and have a beautiful 10 month old.
ReplyDeleteMy experience with the “I love you” was not ideal, but I can look back on it now and laugh. I was very young (only 18) and had been dating my boyfriend for 8 months. I was itching to tell him I loved him, but I wanted him to say it first.
ReplyDeleteWhen I talked to friends about the situation, the general consensus was “if he doesn’t love you by now, something’s wrong.” So one restless night, I shot out of bed and made him meet me really late at night to have the “where is this going talk.” Turns out he was just nervous to say the words because of scars from previous relationships. I had been too obsessed with the actual words to see that his actions spoke volumes for how much he loved me.
We’ve been together almost five years, and I definitely will not be making the same mistake again by forcing a proposal on him. I want him to do it out of his own free will, when he is ready, and not because of another “where is this going” relationship talk.
I "tried" to say it first! But, the funny thing is, as I was explaining my feeling, he totally cut me off and said, "I love you!" and we hugged and I felt so great.
ReplyDeletexo
Rebecca
www.rebeccamarin.com
So, my now-husband made the huge mistake of asking me, at a time when we were "just friends" where I thought our relationship was going. I went with a frightening degree of honesty and said that I loved him and was pretty sure he was going to marry me! One declaration of "I'll never marry you" and three tumultuous years later, and we walked down the aisle :). Ten years on, and I am still delighted to have been right!
ReplyDeleteI told my now-husband about a month or so into dating that "I think I might be falling in love" with him. His response: "Oh. Thanks!" Knife in heart! I had the matzo ball talk with friends after. Luckily, he said it about a week or so later on his birthday, and the rest is history.
ReplyDeleteThat's really sweet about you and your husband :)
ReplyDeleteI have said it first twice - once was a really dysfunctional situation and I didn't tell him till after we had "broken up" and he did not reciprocate. He told me much, much later that he had loved me - by the time we'd both moved on and he had moved in with another woman. It was validating to hear, at least.
With my current boyfriend, I knew early on. We'd been friends for many years. But I refused to say it first, and kept quiet, even though it kept trying to sneak out. He said it shortly after I started fighting the urge to say it!
This has been on my mind a lot lately - I have been dating my boyfriend for 4 months and I love him, and I think he might be it. I've never been one for discretion but I don't want to scare him (he's the guarded, logical type). I know from his actions how he feels though - I'll probably end up saying it first.
ReplyDeleteOh, I love Alex's response... you must have felt ecstatic! Although I'm married to him now, I scared my later-to-be husband early on by telling him I love him. Problem with me is I had always worn my heart on my sleeve and spoke it. I've since learned to filter certain things as I "mature", but I generally still let people know when I love and admire them- hopefully without being too creepy about it! I figure we're living life to experience this stuff so why bury it?
ReplyDeleteOh, this is a great post! My now husband and I had a long history before we got married. We dated a little in college, but broke up because I had big plans for my life, haha. When I went to a foreign country to teach English he came to visit me and told me then that he loved me. I didn't feel the same. Years later when we rekindled our relationship and I knew I was ready to tell him, I was intent on saying it before he did, but right as the words were coming out of my mouth, he said it first!
ReplyDeleteHaha! I said it to to my boyfriend first! We were staying up north at a hotel for an out of town wedding and we'd just crashed a second wedding upstairs in the hotel for a dance with some strangers. My exact words were "I think I might love you... a little bit." 2 years later, we're looking at houses and rings!
ReplyDeleteIn a past relationship, I thought I loved him after a few months dating. So on the night of my 21st birthday, drunk as a skunk, I said it to him in a bar surrounded by our friends... It didn't go so well...
ReplyDeleteIn my present and awesome relationship, we were in bed one night after a particularly stressful day. We were about to fall asleep, but I couldn't not say the words before we slept... It was nice and is still one of our fondest memories!!
Yep, I said I love you first in my most recent relationship. It had been 6 months and I loved him very much and was 100% sure he loved me too. (I always felt like he was a bit more into me than I was into him...). Well, I was wrong. And even though we were together for 6 months after that, I waited every day to hear those words, and I never did until the night we broke up when he said "I love you, I have for a long time, but I don't think you're the one."
ReplyDeleteNeedless to say, I will never say it first again and I will shout it from the rooftops to PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GIRLS, DON'T SAY IT FIRST!SAVE YOUR DIGNITY! (My ex was soo nice about it but it's still a punch in the gut, no matter how it's handled.) My roommate has contemplated telling her boyfriend she loves him and I'm like seriously? Have you learned nothing!?
But maybe I am a bit cynical about it all because I think it was the root of all of our problems in the end. Ok, end rant.
I was the first to say "I love you" when my husband and I first started dating. I was a little tipsy and it slipped out. His response? "Um... I don't think I'm there yet." Ouch. I definitely felt like an ass for saying it first, but it all worked out in the end - he ended up saying it back a couple months later and we've been married almost 3 years now. :)
ReplyDeleteWe had been dating for about 3 weeks, and I knew I loved him but I didn't want to say it first! So instead I said, "J'Taime". Luckily for me he didn't know a word of French, so when he asked me what it meant I just said it meant "I like you". A week later he told me he loved me! I fessed up and he thought it was sweet. Three years later we are happily married! Sometimes when we are in public in a non-mushy sentiments appropriate setting, we just mouth "J'Taime." Mushy? Maybe, but I'm okay with it. :)
ReplyDeletei told my husband after 3 days, he responded by proposing, the next day he called my mom to ask for my hand! 10 years later we are more in love and ever thankful that we listened to our hearts and took a chance!
ReplyDeleteI said it first. We had been dating for about 4 months and I had been rather hesitant about showing my cards to this very charming man I was carefully falling in love with. We were on a weekend retreat in upstate New York, capping off a very romantic day with dinner at a quiet brew pub and somehow the conversation moved in a "what are we doing" direction. My boyfriend spoke for a while about how he couldn't tell where I stood with him. Not wanting to spill my feeling in front of the restaurants 5 other patrons, I listened to his frustrations sympathetically and then spent the ten minute walk to our hotel silently building up courage. As soon as we got to the room I promptly took him by the shoulders and declared "You want to know where I stand? Well, okay, I love you." His eyes popped out of his head and he repeated the words back to me. He has since told me he almost said it three times that day, but held back. Three years later he is very proud of the fact that I said it first and tells that story regularly.
ReplyDeleteI'd just gotten out of a horrible relationship before I started dating my boyfriend, so I was afraid to even use the words ever again. He said it first, and had to wait a few months before I said it back! Still going strong 3.5 years later! =)
ReplyDeleteUm, first let me just say that I LOVE THIS PHOTO. Gorgeous!
ReplyDeleteSecond...I'm embarrassed to admit, I can't remember how my husband and I said it for the first time! I think he said it first, but I have no clue where we were or anything! Your post will prompt a good dinner conversation tonight for our date night.
royalproclaims.blogspot.com
is it super sad that I don't remember who said it first?
ReplyDeleteYour story about saying it first to your husband gave me shivers. Nicely done, both of you.
ReplyDeleteWhen my husband said it to me first, I said, "....Oh, OK, thanks." Not my finest moment.
great post, the "I love you elephant cracked me up". I think we have all been there, at least once-no?
ReplyDeletetotally said I love you first. He did not give as nice of an answer as your Alex, but he gave one nonetheless. Still in love 5 years later, I guess it all worked out ;)
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I said it first to my first boyfriend--over the phone and didn't get a response back until a week later. AWKWARD!I have learned my lesson and haven't said it first since!
ReplyDeleteWith my current boyfriend, he said it right before we were going to run our 10 mile race that we had been training so hard for, and I couldn't ask for a more perfect moment :)
Thanks for sharing!
-Victoria
The Stylista Diaries
I waited and let him say it first, but it was SO hard! There was LOTS of "I l-like you" before he finally said it. And I'm so glad I waited - we had just exchanged Christmas gifts, and his Christmas card was so sweet I started crying. He hugged me, and I asked him why he always knew the perfect things to say. He pulled back and said "You know why." I asked "Why?" And he hugged me and whispered in my ear, "...because I love you!" <3
ReplyDeleteUgh I wanted to say it so badly, but have never said it first. I couldn't stop thinking about those 3 words that I started hearing things. He would whisper "sleep tight" and I would hear "I love you". I would always excitedly say "What did you just say?!" and he would repeat what he actually said and I would be bummed. It made me crazy but I couldn't stand to say it first and not hear I love you back.
ReplyDeleteMy boyfriend accidentally (or maybe not so?) said it first. We'd be dating for about a month and were on the phone after I had an unfortunate mishap with a jalapeno and was in a lot of pain, and he'd called to make sure I was okay. We were about to hang up and he said, "Love you" and I said, "WHAT?!" And he said, "Oh! I was... um, I was just talking to my mom and ended the call with that and... I must've just had it on the brain." A couple weeks later he said it for real.
ReplyDeleteI said it first, by several months actually, but it was ok, I would rather him say it when he meant it than just to say it right back. His response "I already knew" in a sweet way
ReplyDeleteAww what a sweet story. When my boyfriend first said it to me he'd actually miss heard me when I said "thank you" and he replied "love you too" I couldn't help but laugh my ass out and I just shouted "I DIDNT SAY THAT" and we laughed about it. But that's just the kind of relationship we have :) xxx
ReplyDeleteOh what a beautiful first "I love you"! It made me a little teary (I'm a sucker for a lovely love story).
ReplyDeleteHe said it first. And then I made him say it again and again because I loved hearing it so much!
Bea x
http://www.thegoogleyear.blogspot.com.au/
Well, with my boyfriend of five years, I spilled this "i love you" thing very early on. The circumstances were not something I can explain now, but I was sure for that, and needed to get it off of my chest, regardless of his answer. Luckily he held me, he smiled while his eyes were tearing, and said I love you too. And it was the first time he ever said it to a girlfriend. :)
ReplyDeleteIt's not bad saying it first if you feel it and if you feel that the other person will not use you after that despite of their feelings. Just make sure you are ready for what comes after...
Swoon! What a lovely story. You and Alex are such a cute couple!
ReplyDeleteNot only I said first I love you to my now husband, but I also kissed him first for the first time :)
ReplyDeletehttp://belikedot.blogspot.co.uk/
I've never said I love you first... But seconds before my now ex said it to me for the first time (as in, before he opened his mouth) I knew what he was going to say, and I was so happy he did because I'd been DYING to say it to him. At the moment, I feel like I'll be very cautious before saying it again, but I'm sure that when I fall in love again I'll be bursting to say it!!!
ReplyDeleteI said it first to my boyfriend. WE had been dating for eight months (!) and it was killing me. He said it right back :) He was afraid to say it because we were about to be dating internationally long-distance and didn't know what would happen to us. What happened was we stayed together and three years later we love LOVE each other ha!
ReplyDeleteIt made me feel powerful to say it first. I love expressing myself and saying "I love you" was a fulfilling extension of that desire. I say, go for it!
-Kristina
That's kind of what happened with me! I blurted out "I love you" few days before I was leaving the country. I was hugging my boyfriend good bye at the door before he left my place, and the words just came out. He finally said it to me the night before I left, when he was convinced his feelings won't change no matter where I go. We're in the second year of long-distance (on opposite sides of the world!) and still in love.
DeleteSame with me :) My boyfriend and I met in Germany and were strictly just friends but he came out to CA to see me and one thing led to another and what do you know, we're long distance. I said it when he was here visiting so we were only "technically" together for a few weeks. But, we both knew and now know for sure that we had been secretly in love with each other for a long time. There is something about being thrown on opposites sides of the globe that make you want to scream it from the rooftops :)
DeleteHaha, so sadly, I can't remember how my boyfriend's and my first "I love you" went. I wish I had that story to tell!
ReplyDeletehttp://lasaloperie.blogspot.com
Oh gosh I wish I could remember who said it first!! Actually I wish I could remember either of us saying it at all in the early days.
ReplyDeleteWe started being friends when he was 13 and I was 15 and the relationship evolved from there. It's just one big blur of teenage hormones in my mind!! Now 15 years later and two little munchkins we say I love you everyday.
Our "I love you" story is a bit embarrassing ... I laugh about it now - but Husband still blushes red! Husband said it first - we were young college students and had just come back from his fraternity date dash. I had partied a bit more than I should have an was in the bathroom (oh, silly young me...) and as he was holding my hair back - he told me he loved me. I looked at him and said "That's nice" Doh!
ReplyDeleteThe next morning I asked him if he told me he loved me and he denied it. For almost an entire year I thought I imagined him telling me he loved me! I kept waiting for him to say it but I just couldn't hold it in and of course I told him I loved him when we were at a dance club right by the speakers so I yelled it in his ear. I just remember getting a funny look. Oh, young love...
I honestly can't remember when we truly told each other we loved each other. But we've been together for 12 years, married for 8 and have two beautiful boys. It must be love if he told me while I was not at my finest!
Honestly, I think we get too worked up about this as a culture! Love is such a generous emotion; we shouldn't clam up about it!
ReplyDeleteI knew I was in love with my husband within three days of meeting him. A few months later, I told him. He wasn't into me. He apologized for not being able to return my feelings. Did it hurt? Sure - I was 19 and it was like the end of the world. But it didn't change our friendship - not a jot, actually, and we were the best of friends by then. Life moves on. Two years later, he suddenly realized he was in love, too. We moved in together. The rest, as they say, is history: 12 years of it!
Yes! I said it first to my boyfriend, whom I have been with for nearly 4 years. We were very good friends for about a year before anything romantic happened, however I always knew there was something special there. Finally after taking a trip together to Argentina I knew I couldn't hold it anymore so I told him on New Years Eve! It's very characteristic of both of us, he is more reserved while I'm the more outspoken and impatient one :)
ReplyDeleteOh gosh! That is so sweet.
ReplyDeleteI told my first serious boyfriend I loved him three weeks after we met. I was 18, a freshman in college, and he was the first boy I ever fell for. I realized I loved him at a crazy, loud rock concert two weeks after we met, but I manage not to blurt it out until the following week! We were laying in my twin-sized bed in my dorm room, almost asleep, and I was too nervous to flat out say "I love you," even though I wanted to. So I said "Can I tell you something? I think I'm falling in love with you." I know that means the same thing, but it seemed less scary to say it that way! Fortunately he told me he was already in love with me, too. :)
ReplyDeleteMy current boyfriend told me he loved me THE DAY WE MET. I thought he was crazy and shut the front door in his face. But here we are, four years later, totally in love and planning our October wedding.
Joanna, hi!
ReplyDeleteWhat's the lipstick you used on this photo? Lovely, by the way.
Thanks,
Stacey
Joanna, hi!
ReplyDeleteWhat's the lipstick you used on this photo? Lovely, by the way.
Thanks,
Stacey
We were friends/more than friends for about two years and had been officially dating for about two months. I had been planning on telling him for about two weeks, and I finally psyched myself up to tell him on the night of my thesis's gallery opening (I was an art major). I just had a lot of anticipation built up for that day because of the show and for some reason I felt that the right moment would eventually present itself in some way throughout the course of the night. Not only that but the night of my presentation was coincidentally the three year anniversary of his father's death and I hoped maybe that hearing those three words would let him know I was planning on always being around for him. Funnily enough though, he beat me to the punchline and spontaneously blurted it out the night before my thesis presentation while we were in bed together. We had a laugh when I told him how I'd been carefully planning to tell him that for two weeks, but regardless, here we are dating a year later :)
ReplyDeleteI said it first! He was dropping me off one night, about 4 months in, and I just had to get out of the car and get in the house before I slipped because I knew I had to say it. AND the previous night, we both had said we wanted to be together and get married one day, we are weird. So he stops me before we even get off the driveway and asks me, "what's up? Is something wrong?" (We had just had dinner with his parents) and I said I can't keep it in anymore, I love you! And he said, "I love you, I should have said it last night, and I've felt it for a while." I was so relieved he said it back. We are also getting married in April.
ReplyDeleteI said I love you first, and proud of it ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd I absolutely love that you referenced Seinfeld. Perfect!
xo TJ
Such a nerve wrecking and exciting moment...I think back on that moment with thrill and happiness but in the midst of it it feels like torture! But when it is returned? Amazing.
ReplyDeleteDani // andbubblegum.com
I've never been the one to say I love you first and to be honest I hadn't found love I was just enjoying being in a fun college relationship. The man I've been dating for the last seven/eight months however is the man of my dreams, seriously! After five months (even though I knew at two months) I couldn't hold it in any longer. It was after dinner one night walking back to the car while in the middle of a conversation before leaving on a week and half vacation that I decided I was going to say it to him. He started giggling and said seriously...I've been thinking of telling you for the last few weeks that I love you. It happened so all of sudden and in parking lot of all places but it felt so right and perfect to know we were both on the same page at the same time.
ReplyDeleteI fell very early for my husband just like you. I probably was in love with him by the first week according to the butterflies in my stomach but I waited a little over a month before initiating the following exchange:
ReplyDeleteme - i think this is heading towards being in love. is that something you'd want?
him - yes it is
me - so do you want to just do it? be in love?
him - mhmm (i do most of the talking as you can tell!)
me - then let's do it... I love you
he took awhile to get comfortable saying it after that first time, but he made me feel great about saying it by always tightly squeezing me after i said it. i used to tell him "squeezes mean i love you".
now that we are married, you would never know he was so shy in the beginning as he is now the one who is always all kisses and i love yous!
I whispered it to my boyfriend after he had fallen asleep because I knew he wasn't ready to reciprocate and I was bursting. As soon as the last words left my lips, he massively twitched and punched me in the face (not the first time that had happened but the timing was .... amazing). He never woke up.
ReplyDeleteI've only been in love once-with my husband. He said it first-like you, early on in a "I think I'm falling in love with you" fashion. To which I freaked because it was "too fast". But his early admission really allowed me to open up and allow myself to feel the things I was protecting myself from. And he was right.
ReplyDeleteI recently broke up after couple of years of an intense relationship (aka i have been recently dumped from completely out of the blue). Now looking back, i think that not being synchro on the "i am in love with you" or "i love you" should have been a sign that we would have never been synchro. As you can read behind the lines- i was the one saying that first and got a "thank you" back. Definitely a learning for the future!
ReplyDeleteSame with me, joanna. I knew I knew loved him as soon as we started dating, but only had the courage to say anything after six months of oficial relantionship. Once I heard he was completely commitment afraid, I never knew exactly how to say it and avoiding him to freak out. So, when it happened it was very spontenous, we were lying down together, after he took a short trip and I was so happy and had missed him so much, that after kissing him non-stop for a very long time, I said it. And he smiled at me and said it back and added: " after all this time with you, I think it's the first time love makes a very strong and real sense to me".
ReplyDeleteJo! Alex's reply was the cutest thing I've ever read, I might've accidentally made a dying whale noise in response.
ReplyDeleteSo cute! A very romantic moment I guess...
ReplyDeleteI realized one day when I was lying on the beach with a group of friends and my boyfriend wasn't there. All of the sudden I sat up and I was like 'I think I love Ben' one of my friends replied 'I thought you might'. We had only been dating for 4 months at that point and I waited another 2 after that when one night we ate oysters and I got food poisoning and Ben helped me through 4 hours of retching and as we were falling asleep on pillows on the bathroom floor, I figured even if he hasn't said it after helping me through this he must love me too so I told him I loved him. He didn't get a chance to say it back because a wave of sickness took me over but he told me the next morning that he loved me too! That was about 5 years ago and we're getting married this August! :)
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHello Joanna!
ReplyDeleteAlthough I come to your blog everyday, this is my first comment! Shame on me! :)
Well, first of all: that photo of you too is absolutely beautiful! "Linda" as you say it in Portuguese! :)
Well, my then friend now husband said it first! Actually he said it so many times for two years before we started dating (I was a little scared of being in a relationship so I couldn't make my mind)! The poor thing! :)
The summer we finally started dating, I just said it out loud, like it was really obvious: "Of course I love you! Duh!"
Great blog and great post Joanna! Thank you!
Oh, Alex's answer is just the cutest moment ever!
Diana
On the subject of I love you, not long after my husband and I first said it to each other (on Christmas day 2 months after dating), we were just getting into the casual "I love you" goodbyes/greetings. Running out the door for work, I said "I love you!". He said "I love you too!!" to which I answered "NO TOO"! I then explained (somewhat embarassed) that by saying 'too', it feels to me like you mean it less. Too...also...responding...somehow diminished the meaning for me or means it isn't equal. Now we just say "I love you"..no too :) Engraved in our rings is "No Too".
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, the first time I said I love you to my boyfriend was a Freudian Slip of sorts! We were just getting into my car when he started to have some kind of coughing attack. I reached over and yelled "DON'T COUGH I LOVE YOU!" without a breath or anything inbetween.. it just flew right out of my mouth. I grasped my mouth and started dying of laughter, and he did too. Luckily, he asked me if it was true, and I nodded. He loves me too, he said. So cute, whenever one of us coughs now, that's what we think of/say to each other.
ReplyDeleteThe fisrt time my boyfriend told me he loved me was still kind of early in the relationship. He was about to leave on a business trip, and he said, "I love you". I said, "Don't forget your coat"! It caught me so off guard that I didn't know what to say. We still laugh about that! :)
ReplyDeleteI wanted to tell my boyfriend I loved him after about a month, but thought it was WAY too early to say it, so I had to bite my tongue. After a while this got so hard, like I'd start saying it and then have to quickly change it to something else, ie 'Jamie...you're amazing.' (I thought this fooled him, but no, apparently it was obvious!) One night I just thought I'd say it, so I did and thank god he said it back. I will never forget the way he looked when I said it - like all his dreams had come true. Now we say it literally all the time! x
ReplyDeleteHA! Seinfeld is hilarious! I love telling people I love them and I am too expressive and emotional to keep it inside and wait for someone else to tell me, but I'll wait a little bit to make sure I'm being honest with myself before I blurt something so intimate out like that. Loving someone is a magical thing and whether it happens a hundred times or just once, it's definitely worth making that effort for.
ReplyDeletex
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI have not read one single comment; I stumbled upon this blog; but it hit so close to home; I had to follow it!
ReplyDeleteYES!! I said it first!
And HE said; "Well, I love YOU"! and the amazing thing; is that I have never said it; nor felt it!
and I will now change my life around so I can live with it!"
And he did. This was 37 years ago! Our 35th anniversary is Tuesday!
My birthday is tomorrow; his birthday is Monday!
Your question just popped out of my screen!
Penelope
I forgot to say; it was complicated! I was just separated; with one daughter, 6; he had two daughters 11 and 12!
ReplyDeleteIt was extremely complicated....and it had a happy ending!
(all girls) Now they are 43, 47 and 49!!
there can be happy endings to complicated beginnings!!!.
(His former wife is very happily remarried)
Grandchildren galore! Happiness rules!
We have good natured debates about who was first. My hubs signed it to me first, and the next day I said it first. So it was a mutual thing.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, what an adorable photo of you two! Love how intimate it feels.
ReplyDeleteAlso what a sweet story - it's always SO scary saying those three words for the first time. I feel like you should be able to tell how the other person feels though but I have had my fair share of mishaps with it as well.
He said "I think I'm already there." ?! Heart melt!!! And just imagining how nervous you must have been to say that, and how safe your heart felt once he answered you the sweetest thing ever...! Oh, I love it.
ReplyDeleteMy boyfriend and I had been friends for 5 years before the fateful night. He was my date to my sister's wedding. It was that night I realized I was in love with him, and had been for ages. A couple days later, while he was driving me home from dinner, I had an Oscar-worthy melt down in the car. I blurted out that I loved him. The problem? I was Canadian and lived in Canada, and was Australian and he lived in Australia. I got on the plane home four days later, without hearing those three little words back from him. Two weeks later I got an email from him telling me he'd loved me since the day he met me. Fast-forward four years, and we finally, FINALLY got our act together. I moved to Australia, and we have been together and happy for 7 months now.
ReplyDeleteI've never really been the first. But, that being said, after a couple of weeks with my current companion, we were laying in bed and he looked at me this certain way...and I couldn't stop myself from saying, "You love me."
ReplyDeleteAnd he said, "Well. Um. Well, meeuh, uhhh, oh fuck it. I fucking love you."
It was darling and couldn't have happened to us in a better fashion.
I wasn't the first. [I'm 18 and not allowed to date, so technically the better title for him is best friend rather than "boyfriend."]
ReplyDeleteMy best friend and I had gone out to lunch with some friends, and he told me he wanted to go for a walk so we could talk. We went out to the parking lot and he told me that he thought I was the most beautiful woman in the world... then we went for a walk and he kept asking what my dad would think when he told him how he felt about me. So finally I just looked at him and said, "well what are you gonna tell him?"
We stopped- right in front of a McDonald's- and he looked at me and said, "I think I love you." That knocked all the thoughts out of my head and I think I managed to get something out about him being my best friend and the only one I could spend my life with... But I made him wait until the next day before I said it back! We went for a 9 mile run and I couldn't say anything until we hit 2.75 miles... and then I told him :) He tells me that that was the most suspenseful 2.75 miles of his life!
It's only been a week since then and I cannot wipe the smile off my face! we joke that all our special moments are in the most ridiculous places :)
your web is cool how do you do it
ReplyDeletehttp://dreamspheretradecopier-review.blogspot.com/
I talk in my sleep so apparently I said it first. But don't count that since I was unconscious. He said, "I love you too" when I opened my eyes.
ReplyDeletehttp://lachapstickfanatique.blogspot.com
I said it first to my husband, and to this day he apologizes because he couldn't say it back. Its not that he didn't, he explains, it was just so much emotion that he didn't want it to just be the thing he said back in the moment. Its funny though, because I don't even remember that he didn't say it back. I wasn't hurt by that. I was just stating the fact, and really didn't have any emotional strings attached to his response.
ReplyDeleteWe've been married for almost three years now and I am still more vocal with those three words than he is, however I have never not felt loved by him. I'm just more of a wordy communicator than he is, I guess. :)
My boyfriend said it first! We had only been dating for a few weeks and we were watching a movie at his apartment when out of nowhere he said "I think I'm falling in love with you". I was caught of guard because I was leaving in a few weeks (I live in Canada, he lives in France), and all I could say was "Don't say that". I had to explain to him that I didn't want to say anything because I was leaving and I didn't want to make it harder to leave than it already would be. So we carried on with our evening and it wasn't till about two days before I was leaving that I told him I love him..via text message (I'm a coward, i know). He responded saying, "I know.. I love you too" and we decided to try to make it work. We are approaching our one year mark together (even though we've only been physically together for a total of 6 weeks) and I couldn't be happier! Long distance is so hard, but I'll be spending 4 months with him in France over the summer and I couldn't imagine my life without him!
ReplyDeleteYes! With my fiance I just knew. I kept to myself and just like you, one night when we had just gotten in bed I said, "I love you."
ReplyDeleteSilence
So I asked if he heard me and he said, "You said the "L" word." I was crushed, but I felt better. My feelings were out there and he was a slow mover. A few months later he told me. And things keep getting better and better!
I said it to my boyfriend first! My first serious boyfriend. From the beginning of our relationship, he kept saying "You're all mine, right?" So finally about month 2, I asked him what he meant by that, did it mean he loved me? And he said I just meant I'm not looking around for anybody else, the L word makes people crazy, we need to wait on that and take it slow. He had been burned by past girlfriends cheating on him and mistreating him, so he was slow to open up to me. I wanted to say it really bad though! I love easily and have no trouble expressing my emotions.
ReplyDeleteI waited till month 4, thought it through, then decided to say it. He had to get up early for work, and when we kissed goodbye I looked up at him and said "I love you." He immediately said it back, then looked at me funny and said, "Thought I told you to hold onto that one." Not sure what I said next, but we say it all the time now. I just had to say it, even if he didn't say it back. He already had shown me by his actions how much he loved me, and still does. He's never been big on expressing emotions, but he treats me so good, I know he loves me regardless of whether he says the words.